Good morning! 🙌 Stay Fruity content update – 19.11 + Bonus song ‘Triggered’

On Tuesday the 22nd I will share a relationships post ‘My relationship with myself. Are we friends?’ I define love, look at how our socialisation impacts our concept of love and my issue with applying my ‘best’ qualities to myself. The statement the one’s closest to us may get the brunt of our emotions may ring true. More so for ourselves. We spend a lot of time in our heads, and it would be nice if it was a pleasant place to be.

On Thursday the 24th I shall post my mental health journey ‘How to remember the positives’. What I suspect to be due to my attention deficit, I usually remember positives rather than fully embrace them in the moment. I think we will do well to hold on to these bright moments in life.

Now for the super exciting part…

Triggered captures the less interesting parts of work and how that can be challenging. I link to mental health and how I feel navigating repetitive negative thoughts. I share an insight into my Personal Independence Payments that have finally been awarded after fighting tooth and nail for it. Hope you like it!

Thanks for staying connected.

Stay You, Stay Fruity!

Real Rubens

Bonus Music Post: Big Rubz – Echo

I felt anxious recording the last song Hollow. But with this new piece Echo, it was a pleasure start to finish. Gid asked if I wanted a break when recording some of the layers I was like ‘no’, straight in!

Echo tells a story of how our society tells people who are neurodiverse to seek medical help. I sarcastically note the differences in cliques, and how my neurodiversity (ND) doesn’t hold me back, in fact I feel it’s a character defining strength. My ND helps me face some challenges fearlessly with clarity, especially after I process my reoccurring negative thoughts and feelings.

Trigger warning. The song dips into suicidal ideation then finishes off comparing my life with a possible unhinged parallel of being addicted to drugs. A testament if I may say, to who I am and intend to be. Again, if I may, best tune yet. Gid agreed. Hope you like it!

More to come.

Stay You, Stay Fruity

Real Rubens

Morning! 🙌 Stay Fruity content update! 13.08 + Bonus song ‘Hollow’

On Tuesday the 16th I will publish the career development/ability not disability/mental health piece ‘Imposter syndrome’. A buzz word to many, for me it means in a group but not sure if that’s the one. A half identity. Read all about it on Tuesday!

On Thursday the 18th I’ll share the ability not disability and mental health journey piece on my swimming journey ‘Recent sprained ligament in elbow – little wobble in the swim training programme’. After two elbow operations over 10 years ago it’s a disability I forget I have, have a read on Thursday for an articulation of this solemn reminder. Operations are life changing. The resilience you develop can be next level character defining. My operations were the most humbling experience of my life and this was a tender and timely reminder.

Hollow is a piece which captures my inability to trust, a bad relationship, a fleeting childhood, some trauma linked to latent anger, and the feeling of treading on eggshells in most areas of my life. Hope you like it!

Stay You Stay Fruity.

Thanks for following the blog.

Real Rubens.

Hello! 🙌 Content update! 6.08 + Bonus Music Post! ‘Big Rubz – I Hear Colours.’

Big Rubz – I Hear Colours

Straight in with this new ‘banger’. I Hear Colours is an R&B piece capturing my Attention Deficit balancing impulsivity with desired outcomes, dealing with people who hide their intentions/take advantage, acknowledging the challenge of feeling happy due to a lack of natural dopamine, and self-exploration through creativity. Self-expression through creativity being one of Stay You Stay Fruity’s core values. Thanks in advance for listening. Onto the upcoming post schedule!

On Tuesday the 9th I will publish the informative piece ‘It’s time to see there’s different forms of OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder).’ Some people may believe you have to have particular rituals like tapping, counting, cleaning. This isn’t the case for everyone with OCD. In this blog I explore alternatives from a personal perspective.

On Thursday the 11th I’ll share the update on my swimming journey ‘Recent sprained ligament in elbow – little wobble in the swim training programme’. Having had two elbow operations and not had an issue for a while I tried to increase strength in my arm. To be stronger you can build strength, or address weaknesses. Big mistake trying to make my arm stronger. Nearly made me need a third operation. Definitely felt like it. In this post I delve into what it was like and what I was thinking throughout.

Thanks for your interest and I hope you enjoy.

Stay You, Stay Fruity,

Real Rubens

Big Rubz – Never Free

Following an energised rap, here’s another.

This song represents the monotony of life, how we wear a mask, especially those among us with neurodiversity, a mask to survive and meet expectations, proving we can function in a socially acceptable way, usually at the cost of authentic. One way of processing this is that we are reimbursed for our efforts but still costs the luxury of our energy, attention and focus. These factors by definition of a disability can be hard to capitalise to investing them can be a double edged sword.

I discuss how, despite living life fuelled by emotions and trauma, that I always try to avoid violence, including arguments. This can lead to keeping people at an arms length to prevent becoming hurt or avoid situations which I may not be energised by.

‘The beast’ represents the true version of myself. Now and the future. Seeing glimpses but not seeing the whole picture. I am cautious about the company I keep and I regularly review this, test this, sometimes to buffer my mental health, and sometimes to test trust and loyalty.

Here’s a glimpse into me, I hope there’s some lyrics you can harmonise with. Enjoy the track.

Stay free, stay you, stay fruity.

Real Rubens.